Monday, January 22, 2007

I'm A TV nut, so sue me!

I am hooked.

Yes, John, just like how you said it.

I'm back on the couch, all vegged-out, and totally obsessed with Heroes.

The show follows the story of several people who find out they have special powers -- flight, telepathy, superhuman strength, the ability to stop time.. These people soon realize they must band together to stop a catastrophe, and as tv cliches go, save mankind.

Before you say what I know what you're gonna say, please stop and don't think it's X-Men.

It's far from it.

What I liked about this show is that it doesn't try to stylize these seemingly ordinary people and turn them into world-saving superheroes overnight. There are no costumes involved. No capes. No dazzling special effects. Just a bunch of people trying to make sense of it all.

"Save the cheerleader, save the world." -- Hiro Nakamura

You have Peter Petrelli, a male nurse who can temporarily mimic the powers of others within close proximity. Claire Bennet, a cheerleader with the power of invincibility. Isaac Mendez, an artist who can paint the future when he's high. Hiro Nakamura, a Japanes comic book geek who has the ability to stop time. Matt Parkman, an LAPD cop with telekinetic powers, among others.

Heroes is one of the most engaging, nail-gripping, superbly-written shows around.

Enough with reality tv. We already live in it.

Heroes will restore your faith back in tv. Watch it.

Monday, January 15, 2007

I'm so effing bored with this stupid presentation I'm doing. Who cares about sales of so and so? Who bloody cares about brand opportunities? Who EFFING CARES?!!!

In the long run of things, no one would remember any of this shit. It's boring and pointless. It's a pain. What merit would I have in doing this? A badge of honor? A fatter paycheck? A fixed hole in the ozone? Nothing.

Absolutely nothing.

At the end of the day, you try to console yourself with the thought that you're doing all this crappy shit with a thought of you being really part of something big. How fucking noble.

But what you really think, and is in that nagging part at the back of your otherwise sensible head, is that this 'really something big' is one big piece of junk.

And you've just exponentially wasted your life being that tiny little wheel attached to it and which was meant to bear the brunt of its massive hubris.

Doesn't reality suck?

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Library Things and other stuff

I've been obsessing about this Library Un-Suggester from ever since I read about it in Neil Gaiman's journal.

What it does is, see, is it analyzes your online book catalogue and checks it against the other 8 million other people who logged theirs on and compare which books you would mostly likely won't own or would dislike.

Neato, right?

So I keyed in The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald and the Un-Suggester came up with amazing results. The books I'd least likely won't give a crap about are mostly these Christian authors and books about quests on the New Testament and you won't believe, a book called The Gagging of God. (I did seem a bit heathen-ish, don't I?) Errmm.. that's one book I won't bring if I'm stranded on a desert island. Maybe Ivanhoe.

Anyhoo, I've been quite busy uploading and cataloguing my books, because I'm telling you there's a LOT. Some forgetten. Some squeezed in cracks in other people's shelves. It's a disarray, really.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

The IC (the so-called sitcom)

More like the sitcom that never was..
What do you get when you put six twentysomethings in one dinner table?
A slew of one-liners, punchlines, anti-punchlines, quirks and smirks in between
cake slices and cold coffee.

Here's an earful of what it's like trying to make sense of life and
making a point


John: I don't watch TV, anymore. I download.
Meg: It's the same thing.


(Sylvan handing out his MUSE magazines.)
Marge: Ano 'to?Sylvan: That's my latest advocacy.
Meg: Ano daw? What's his latest advocacy?
Sylvan: Arts and culture.
Meg: So, can we send contributions to the magazine?
Dred: Yeah, can we?
Sylvan: Sure. Just send them to me. I'll read them. And then I'll throw them into the trash.


Marge: I have colds.
Sylvan: You shouldn't even be out. This is bad for you.
Marge: Yeah. I'm going home by 9:30.

(Minutes later, Marge wolfed down a whole Cold Rock sundae. And she went home past midnight.)


Meg: Okay, where we eating?
Dred: Sylvan has one rule.
Marge: Anong rule ni Sylvan?
Dred: No fancy food.
Sylvan: Why don't we try Grappas?


Meg: I'm going for NSG.
Sylvan: Sports Grill is fine.
Dred: John hates NSG.
Marge: Yeah, ayaw nga nya.
Meg, Sylvan, Dred: NSG na!


Sylvan: I'm organizing a cultural immersion in Banawe. So, you'll all plant rice.
Meg: What? Do you we have to do that?
Sylvan: Of course. How will you know how the people live if you don't experience what it is like to plant rice?
Meg: And, will you be planting rice, too?
Sylvan: No.
John: He'll give the orders.


John: Five words. Rasha had a blown-out tire.


John: Her tires burst. Near my place.
Rasha. In Gilmore.
Meg: And you helped her?
John: No. I brought our boy.
Rasha: He can drive but he can't change tires.
John. Shhh. You're riding with me tonight! Hah!
Rasha: I can take a cab.
Marge: Do you know what happened to Gretchen?
Meg: I've heard about it from friends. Cause you see, the industry is small.
John: Whoa! The industry is small.

(Three hours later.)

Rasha: Do you guys know what happened to Gretchen? But, uhm, well, I just heard about it from friends.
Sylvan: Wow, from friends... Sige nga, tell us.
John: Yeah, let's see who has better friends in the industry. You or Meg!


Marge: Did you get that e-mail? Yong kay Angelica Panganiban.
John: I don't know her. But I saw it. And if that's true, kawawa naman sya.
Sylvan: I don't know who Angelica Panganiban is. I mean, I've heard of her.
Meg: Mildred, explain.
Dred: Okay Sylvan. First, Angelica Panganiban is an artista.
John: That was so mean! That was baaad! It's like saying zero and one are numbers.

Dred to Rasha: How was the photo-shoot?
John: Nude. Marge: As in, really nude?
Rasha: Yes, nude. Well, they used some accessories.
Sylvan: Nude? What is this? Where is this?
Rasha: Some high-end photographers' group. For arts' sake.
Sylvan: So, the models are nude?
Rasha: Yes, nude.
Sylvan: Where is this?
John: How do I join? How do I get in?
Rasha: Well, you have to have a cam.
John (taking out his phone with a 3.2 megapixel built-in cam): Will this do?


John to Dred: Can I see your phone?
Dred: No.
John: And, why not?
Marge: It has nude pictures.
Meg: Our little lily is a nudist.
John: But I want to see your phone.
Dred: No.
John: You're self-centered!
Dred: Am not.
John: Yes, you are.
Dred: Am not.
John: Yes, you are.
Dred: Not.
John: Are.
Dred: Wait, I have text. My friend texted that Anne Curtis has a new boyfriend. It's on TV.
John: Anne Curtis. You know, it makes me think. And this is really hard. I mean, I go thinking, it's really difficult to choose between Anne Curtis and Heart Evangelista.
Meg: What!?
John: Yeah. Guys have this problem, you know. I mean, look at Anne Curtis. She's okay, but her family isn't. And Heart Evangelista. Her family's okay, but she isn't. It's so hard to choose. It's so hard for guys.
John to Sylvan: Who would you choose?
Sylvan: Hmm. Heart Evangelista because she's wholesome.
Everybody: She's not wholesome!!
Sylvan: She's not?! Okay.
John: So, who would you choose?
Sylvan: I don't know.
John: See, that's my point.


John: And Anne Curtis, I mean, sino barkada nya, si Danica? Look at her family.
Meg: Every family's dysfunctional. My mom hangs a bat at our gate and it's not even halloween. And my dog ate our baby Jesus.


Marge: We're so quiet.
Meg: Yeah. Let's pick-on Sylvan.
Sylvan: Let's pick on John.
John: Let's pick on Dred.
Dred: Let's pick on Rasha.


Sylvan: I don't watch TV, anymore. But I watch Y Speak. I want to know what the youth is thinking.
John: Rasha is youth. What are you thinking Rasha?
Rasha (clueless): Huh? What?

Dred: On the phone, John was like, yes then yes, then, yes.
John: Yes, I don't say YEAH, anymore. I'm so British!


Marge: So, what do you wear to work now?
John: I wear a suit. And as much clothes as I can.
Dred: A suit! Like Barney?John: Yes, like Barney!
Meg: Who's Barney?
John: How I Met Your Mother.
Dred: How I Met Your Mother.
Marge and Meg: Not again.

John: I don't watch TV, anymore. But, did you guys see Fashion Runways? Did you guys see the latest Survivor? And who were the lamest?
Meg: The whites. Hah! That sounds so racist. Whites.


John: I don't have a life.


Sylvan: We are a consumerist society. That's why, it's only the malls who are thriving.

John: I saw Survivor, and I'm hooked again!
Dred: Say it again, John.
John: I'm hooked again!
Meg: It's on the headlines. John's Hooked. John's Hooked Again!


Meg: So, if you're in the zoo, circus or something, what will be your special talent?
Dred: I'll feed a killer whale.
Sylvan: Everybody can do that.
John: That's not a talent.
Dred: It's not? It's a killer whale!

Dred: Si Rasha, what's your talent?
Rasha: Probably put make-up on the animals.
Sylvan: Yes, she can do that.
Rasha: I can't. Their skin is too thick. It'll be hard.
John: Talagang pinag-isipan.

Marge: Ang laki na ng face ko. I'm so fat na.
Sylvan: It's okay. Lahat naman tayo tumaba, eh. Lahat. Para patas.


Sylvan: I had flu. I couldn't talk for seven days.
Meg: So you were like (waves and hand signals).... ..
Dred: Yeah, like this? (motions and does hand language).
Sylvan: No naman. I could speak a little.
Meg: Like this? Uhmm.. ugh..ah...ugh.
John: The two of you are so mean. It's like you planted yourselves in the middle of the table, so you can hit on your target!


Mildred: You should see How I Met Your Mother.
John: Yeah, 'di mo na kelangan mag-isip. It's so funny. It's like Friends. But without the sex part. Friends is 70% sex.
Meg: Of course not, Friends is not 70% sex. It's 50% sex.
Sylvan: Oh, really, did you make an actual computation?